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The Magic Kingdom EPCOT Disney's Hollywood Studios Disney's Animal Kingdom Script: Ellen's Energy Adventure Script: Ellen's Energy Adventure Script For Ellen's Energy Adventure Starring Ellen DeGeneres, Bill Nye, Alex Trebek, and Jamie Lee Curtis Ellen's Energy Adventure is an attraction located in the World of Motion pavilion in Epcot. This is the full ride script. Preshow (There is a large movie screen high up on the wall. The audience stands. The screen is black. Then, Ellen DeGeneres walks into view.) Ellen: Hi, and welcome to the Universe of Energy. How are ya? No need to answer. You guys are probably surprised to see me here, aren't you? But then, there's probably a lot of places you'd be surprised to see me, when you think about it. If you were driving in your car, for instance, okay? Close your eyes, you're in your ca -- no, don't close your eyes in the car, but right now, think about it. You're in your car, you're driving, and then all of a sudden, from the back seat, I just pop up and go, "HEY!" You'd just whack me in the head, wouldn't you? That would be -- that wouldn't be nice, but then it wouldn't be nice for me to do that to you. How'd I get in your car, anyway? Can you -- did you lock the car? Maybe it was your fault. Maybe I'm just teaching you a lesson. But the point is, to see me here, as the spokesperson for the Universe of Energy, I mean that's crazy. You know, I'm the expert on a lot of things. You know that. I know that. But uh, not a lot of things. A few things. But energy. I mean, there was a time I could care less about it. And then, suddenly everything changed. One day, I was sitting in my apartment ... <snaps her fingers and nothing happens> I - I said, I was sitting in my apartment when <snaps her fingers again, and we see Ellen in her apartment, as well as on one side of the screen, so there are two Ellens> There it is. I'd offer you some snacks, but she -- I mean, I -- can't hear ... me. Hey, hey, you! How 'bout sharing some of those chips? Dream Ellen: No, you're on a diet! Ellen: Me? How 'bout you? Anyhoo, I'm watching TV, and my favorite show's about to start. Jeopardy! Announcer: This is ... Jeopardy! Dream Ellen: Yes! Ellen:Told ya this was my favorite show. <There is a knock at the door.> Dream Ellen: What is "Who is it"? <Bill Nye walks in.> Ellen: And of course no one locks their doors in New York. Bill: Hey, it's your neighbor, Bill Nye the Science Guy. Dream Ellen:Hey, Bill Nye the Science Guy, it's Ellen the uh ... just Ellen, I guess. What can I do ya for? Bill: I'd like to borrow some aluminum foil, a clothespin, and a candle. Dream Ellen:Another hot date, huh? Bill: Actually, I'm working on an experiment. Dream Ellen:Ah, take whatever you need. I don't wanna miss any of the game. Bill: What're you watching? Dream Ellen:Jeopardy! Bill: Yes! Jeopardy! Announcer: A professor of energy at Princeton University, Dr. Judy Peterson. Dream Ellen:Oh my gosh. Bill: What?Dream Ellen:It's my old college roommate, Judy Peterson. She was such a smarty-pants know-it-all. I had the best nickname for her, though. Bill: What was that? Dream Ellen:Stupid Judy. Bill: Ellen, that makes no sense. She has a PhD. Dream Ellen:I know, but it made me feel better. So now I guess she's some hot shot energetic professor. Bill: She's a professor of energy! Dream Ellen:Whatever. Who cares about Stupid Judy and her stupid energy? Bill: Ellen, energy's the most important thing in ... the universe! Dream Ellen:Oh yeah, sure, take her side. Bill: I'm not taking her side; it's just that without energy, nothin' would go, nothin' would happen. I mean, there'd be ... nothin'. Dream Ellen:Well, then we'd really be in jeopardy, now wouldn't we? Bill: Yeah, well, what is, uh, "Thanks for the supplies, and, uh, see ya later"? Dream Ellen:What is "Bye bye"? <Bill leaves, while Judy answers a question correctly.> Alex Trebek: Right again. Go. Dream Ellen:<mockingly> Right again, Judy. Stupid Judy. Stupid energy. Maybe the universe needs energy, but I don't. I'll take a nap for a hundred. Ellen: <appears talking on the phone on one side of the screen> Ha ha ha ha. I know. Big piece o' corn right there in the teeth. How could you not see -- <sees the audience looking at her> I'll have to call you back. <hangs up the phone> Ellen:Ahem! Now, as most of you know, when someone falls asleep watching TV, that person is going to have a ....what? Anyone? ... Anyone. Woman's voice: A crick in the neck? Man's voice: A bad hair day. Another woman's voice: A dream sequence. Ellen: That's right, ma'am, a dream sequence! Right. Mine was more of a nightmare, actually. And uh, actually, we should get some fog in here. Always nice to spice up a dream sequence with fog. <Fog rolls across the screen where Ellen is speaking.> No, not in here. Over there. In the dream. <The fog moves into the apartment scene.> Scary, huh? <The dream scene switches from Ellen's apartment to the Jeopardy! set.> Jeopardy! Announcer: This is ... Jeopardy! Now, here are today's contestants: Dr. Judy Peterson, Dr. Albert Einstein, and finally ... just Ellen. And now, here's the host of Jeopardy!, Alex Trebek. Alex Trebek: Thank you, Johnny Gilbert. Hello, contestants. Welcome to our program, and good luck to you in the game. Here are the categories for the first round of play: Solar energy. Wind power. Energy from water. Fossil fuels. Fusion. And finally ... Gas. Ellen, since this is your dream, we'll let you make the first selection. Dream Ellen:Uh, I will take, um ... eenie meenie minie ... uh, Fossil Fuels for, uh, let's -- let's go for a hundred. Alex Trebek: Fine. The answer is ... This is formed from microscopic plants and animals trapped in ocean floor sediment millions of years ago. <Ellen rings in.> Alex Trebek: Ellen? Dream Ellen:Yes, I know that one. That's uh ... that, um, is uh ... what -- what is ... what is um, uh, stuff trapped -- microscopic fuels and -- and plants and -- and animals, and --<buzzer sounds> Alex Trebek: Sorry, Ellen. We were looking for something more than just an embellishment of what I had already said. <Judy rings in.> And it's .. Judy! Judy: What is petroleum, Alex? <Judy proceeds to ring in with a string of correct responses.> What is bituminous? <ring> What is solar thermal conversion? <ring> What is hydroelectric? <ring> What is helium? Alex Trebek: And the total as we come to the end of the first round, ladies and gentlemen, Judy has a commanding lead <$17,800>, Ellen has her work cut out for her <Ellen has a negative score.>, and Dr. Einstein is nowhere ... relatively speaking. <He has zero.> Dream Ellen:Is this a nightmare, or what? Alex Trebek: Oh, Ellen, your first correct response! Dream Ellen:Wait a minute. <snaps her fingers> Freeze! <The scene freezes.> This is my dream. I'm in control now. I can still win. I still have a chance to. Bill: Ellen! Ellen! Dream Ellen:Who is it? Bill: It's me, Bill Nye the Science Guy. Dream Ellen:Hey, I'm glad you came to help me. Bill: Actually, I came to see Einstein. Wow, you're gettin' clobbered. Dream Ellen:Yeah. This nightmare Jeopardy! version's a lot harder than the home version. Will you help me? Bill: Sure! But first, we have to go back. Dream Ellen:Back ... stage?? Bill: No, no, no. Way back. Like many billion years ago. Dream Ellen:Okay, but can we stop at a mini-mart or something and get some snacks? I have a tendency to get hungry after a couple of million years. Bill: No can do. Time's a-wastin'. Come on! Ellen: Wait. It's not even over. It gets really weird from here. Now some person I don't even know reminds me there's no eating, drinking, smoking, or flash photography allowed in my dream. Cast Member: Ladies and gentlemen, there's no eating, drinking, smoking, or flash photography in Ellen's dream. Ellen: And no videotaping. Okay? And those of you who're just walking in right now ... you're late. Where have you been? I love your hair. No, not you. I mean, it's all right, but that's cute. Yeah. Um, anyway, so you're not completely lost, here's a recap of what has been going on. I'm Ellen. Hi! I love Jeopardy!, I used to not care about energy at all, 'til I had a nightmare that I was on Jeopardy!, and all the categories were about energy. Oh, don't I know it was scary. So my neighbor, Bill Nye, stepped in, to help me out -- Bill Nye the Science Guy -- you know him? Anyway, so he comes in to help me out. That's what's going on. Got it? Good. You don't? Then that's your problem, because you're late. And you think about that next time! Cast Member: Ladies and gentlemen, the automatic doors in front of you are going to be opening. For your safety, please stand behind the yellow squares. Also, please make sure your party is together before you enter the next theater. Thank you. Main Show Cast Member: Now that you've selected a place to sit, please remain fully seated, and don't attempt to switch rows, seats, or vehicles from this point forward. As a reminder, for the comfort and courtesy of all those around you, please refrain from any eating, drinking, smoking, flash photography, or videotaping. Also, if you happen to be seated near one of the open doors, please make sure that opening is clear of all obstructions, including arms, legs, packages, and anything else you'd like not to get squished. Those doors are automatic, and they'll be closing in just a moment. <music plays> And now we return to Ellen's dream <Ellen and Bill are on a dark screen, holding glow sticks to light their way.> Dream Ellen:Why is it so dark? Bill: 'Cause there's nothin' to see. Dream Ellen:Lemme get this straight. You brought me back billions of years so you could show me ... nothing? Bill: Sort of, uh, but out of this nothingness, many scientists believe the universe was born. Dream Ellen:Must've been a big delivery room, huh? Bill: Uh ... yeah. Ah! See that single point of very hot, very dense matter? <We see a small light in the center of the screen.> It contains all the energy of the universe, that's about to expand. At an astonishing rate! Oh, here, better put these on. <gives Ellen a set of what looks like earmuffs> Hearing protectors. <Ellen puts them on> 'Cause it's ... the Big Bang! Dream Ellen:The piggy bank? Bill: No, the Big Bang! Dream Ellen:The ding-dang? Bill: <lifts Ellen's hearing protectors> The Big Bang. Dream Ellen:Oh. Bill: Now, what you're about to witness took place over billions of years. Oh boy. Whew! Uh, better take cover. <Bill leaves but Ellen doesn't hear him, and stays where she is.> Dream Ellen:<pretending to be guiding a plane for takeoff with her glow sticks> All right, universe, you're cleared for takeoff. Come on. Ha ha ha. Come -- Bill? Bill Nye? Bill Nye the Science Guy? ... Bill? <Bill opens a door and pulls Ellen to safety just before the Big Bang.> <BOOM!> <We see a computer-generated, high-speed depiction of the cataclysmic birth of the universe, with volcanoes erupting, mountains pushing up through the ground, and vegetation eventually covering the earth.> Bill: <emerging from the jungle> Here we are! Two hundred twenty million years in the earth's past. Give or take ... uh, a day. Dream Ellen:Bill? Bill, I -- I know I asked you to help me with this energy stuff and everything but I was kinda hoping you'd show me a slide show. Bill: A slide show? I guess that'd be easier, but -- ha! This is way more fun. Dream Ellen:Uh ... yeah, this is fun. Where's the energy? Bill: Oh, it's all around you. You see, these plants and animals are soaking up energy from the sun. When they die and get buried, time, pressure and heat'll cook them into the fossil fuels we rely on today. Like, uh, coal, natural gas, and oil. Dream Ellen:Wait a minute. You're telling me that we're filling our gas tanks with -- well, with dinosaur soup? Bill: Well, not exactly, but dinosaurs did live when fossil fuels were developing in the earth. And dinosaurs are just cool! Let's check 'em out! Dream Ellen:Why don't we just skip to the air conditioning and jacuzzi period, huh?Bill: Ellen, it's the chance of a lifetime! It's the chance of a hundred million lifetimes! Come on. Dream Ellen:You go ahead and make sure it's safe. I'll -- I'll wait here, okay? <to the audience> You might as well go, too. This is my nightmare. No need you staying with me. <loud roar is heard> Maybe I'll go. What am I so scared of? It's just a dinosaur. What's the big deal about dinosaurs? They're not so tough. Probably have a brain the size of a pea. <another loud roar> Ahhhhh. I hope you're not upset about that pea-brain crack.'Cause, you know, now that I think of it, I'm sure peas are much larger in this time period. I happen to love peas, don't you? <loud roar> I'll take that as a maybe. I should get going, 'cause I'm supposed to be dinner -- I mean have dinner, with friends. So I should ... go. <Ellen tries to distract the dinosaur.> Ellen:Hey, what's over there!? <loud roar, as Ellen runs off> <We see the plants shake as the dinosaur apparently stomps off after Ellen.> Prehistoric Diorama <The theater rotates and the seats break up into sections and move into a large room with animatronic dinosaurs (apatosauruses). At this point, we only hear Ellen and Bill. We can't see them.> Dream Ellen:Oh, Bill, where are you? Ow! Bill, is that you? <roar> That's your stomach growling, isn't it? Okay, I told you we should've stopped for snacks. <roar> You're not Bill, are you? I mean, your name could be Bill, but you're not the Bill that I-- Bill: Hey, Ellen! Dream Ellen:<to the dinosaur> Excuse me. Bill: Come on! They've got everything. Over here. Dream Ellen:No, you come over here. I'm not taking one more step until I can see where I'm going. <really loud roar> That's good enough for me. Wait up, Bill! I'm coming! <We pass scenes of various animatronic dinosaurs, including an allosaurus battling a stegosaurus; an elasmosaurus; and pteranodons; eventually coming to a scene of an audio-animatronic Ellen fighting off a snakelike creature. We can hear snippets of her dialogue as we pass her.> Animatronic Dream Ellen:Don't make me use this thing! ... Stop it! You don't wanna eat me! I'll make you lose your appetite. Help! Ow! ... If you can't say something nice, then ... ya can't. Hey! Listen mister, don't give me th